“The Brittany Renner saga reveals just how many Black men have a real problem with Black women being free.”
-Mumia Obsidian Ali

In the first chapter of my bestselling debut literary effort “The Book of Obsidian”, I make the case that the biggest challenge facing Black Americans in the 21st century was NOT that of “the color line” as intellectual, academic and activist Dr. W.E.B. DuBois most opined in the 20th; but rather that the “shock of freedom” – the successes of the various “movements” of the 1960s and 70s – would produce a new raft of unintended consequences and problems.

In this case, the fact that now that Black men and women are truly free for the first time in the history of our republic, they are finding that they increasingly disagree on some of the most fundamental of life’s affairs. And nowhere is life more fundamental, than deciding what love, relationships, sex, marriage and so on, will look like, and what one’s ideal of these things will mean in real time.

Indeed, as recently as the spring of last year, national media outlets began to openly acknowledge the ever-widening fissures along these lines between Black men and women, now beginning their first century as truly free Americans. In a powerfully insightful piece appearing on the left of center Vox website, reporter Jane Coaston notes that Black men and women sharply diverge on what “family” means:

“Rashawn Ray, an associate professor of sociology at the University of Maryland who has written extensively on how black men vote, told me, “Black men, particularly the 16 percent of college-educated black men who voted for Trump in 2016, are driven by their views about the economy, business growth, and religion. Some black men think that more progressive Democratic candidates are too liberal and they might simply not trust other candidates.” He added that those men weren’t impacted by the “same concerns” as a majority of black women.

In a piece for the Atlantic in 2016, Johnson and Leah Rigueur, an assistant professor of public policy at the Harvard Kennedy School of Government, wrote that black Trump supporters are like to be “likely to be a working-class or lower-middle-class black man, over the age of 35, and interested in alternative approaches to addressing what ails black America,” adding, “these voters tend to be more receptive to core messages of self-determination, financial success as a function of hard work, and personal responsibility, especially when conveyed in a plainspoken, hypermasculine manner.”

Brown agreed when we spoke, telling me, “My take on this is that there are things in the GOP ideology that black men find appealing. The conservative ethos of pulling yourself up by your bootstraps, asserting patriarchy and male dominance, all of these kinds of traditional gender values, some black men find [them] very appealing.” And Karen Finney, a CNN political commentator and political consultant said, “It may be that the disparity relates to an effort to appeal to — for lack of a better word — machismo, portraying Trump as a tough guy, which may resonate more with some black men and not black women who may worry more about the divisiveness.”

Continuing, Coatson also writes:

“But black women are, as a group, highly entrepreneurial, making up one of the fastest-growing segments of new business owners in America. And black women, despite “less traditional” views on gender roles compared to black men and white women and men, are not uniformly liberal. Meaning that logically, the appeal of the “conservative ethos” would apply to black women as well as black men, leading them to vote for conservative candidates or, alternatively, not vote at all.”

““There is no uncertainty about where the Republican Party stands relative to the Democratic Party on gender issues, on women’s equality issues, nor is there much misunderstanding about where the Democratic Party stands relative to the Republican Party in terms of race.” She added that while black men, being men, stood to gain from the “reinforcement of patriarchal structures” that is encouraged, in her view, by the GOP, black women did not.”

“Nadia E. Brown said during our conversation that in general, black Americans are “socially conservative but fiscally liberal,” and for black women, fiscal policies that impact health care or raising children are ones they deal with on a daily basis. Even if socially conservative ideologies are “what people hold in their hearts and practice in their homes,” she argued that many black women see themselves as having a “linked fate,” a common outcome with other black women, and might be unwilling to vote for policies that could harm others in their communities.

Brown argued that black women tend to be “community caretakers,” and their politics is shaped by the view that “even if I’m a financially well-to-do person, I’m still thinking about others in my community.” According to polling conducted by the Institute for Women’s Policy Research, 80 percent of black mothers are the primary earner in their family, while also taking on caregiving duties and enduring a greater likelihood of encountering poverty than every racial group except Native American women.

She said that “black men don’t have that same set of ethos,” using the example of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, who portrayed his sister as helplessly dependent on welfare when in fact she had worked two jobs while Thomas was in law school and only began using welfare benefits when she stopped working to care for an elderly aunt recovering from a stroke. For some black men, Brown said, “they don’t see the sacrifices others are making for them as sacrifices.” (“The gender gap in black views on Trump, explained”, Vox, Mar 9, 2020)

I argue in my book that such fissures will only continue to widen as more Black men become prosperous and successful, and as more Black women see their interests as separate and apart from said Black men (recall rapper/actor/activist Ice Cube’s infamous appearance on the Fox Soul show, “Cocktails with Queens” where he was berated by the hosts for not including a separate section specifically addressing Black women in his “A Contract for Black America” initiative).

What do national politics in a presidential election year have to do with one lovely, free-spirited Black woman at the heart of a social media malestrom, you might ask? Only that one Ms. Brittany Renner, and millions of Black women like her, are finding themselves at the center of gathering storm of discontent on the part of a not insignificant number of Black men who sharply disagree with the way in which she and others like her choose to order their lives. In today’s column, I intend to make the case that such ladies should not be scorned by the Non-Select gentlemen, but rather applauded and celebrated. After all, their very existence in our time is boon for guys like us!

How so, you might ask? Read on!

SHAMELESS PLUG AD BREAK: Haven’t you heard? The wait is over, and it’s official – “The Book of Obsidian: A Manual for the 21st Century Black American Gentleman” has finally arrived and is NOW available at BookBaby, Amazon and wherever fine books are sold – get your copy NOW!!! Better yet, get your personally autographed copy – CLICK HERE for more details! OK, let’s get back to the article!

BRITTANY RENNER: 21st CENTURY “GOOD TIME CHARLENE”
If a case can be made for the textbook definition of an “Instagram model”, Brittany Renner would be it. Hailing from one of the Blackest and poorest states in the union from humble beginnings, Renner set her sights on a burgeoning social media business by setting up shop in a place that would grow to more than one billion active monthly users and one of the most engaged platforms for personal brand or professional business: Instagram. As Renner herself says in very insightful and entertaining interview with “Saint Kevin” Samuels dated Nov 11, 2021 (“When Doves Cry”, Kevin Samuels’ YouTube channel), she made it a point to send off her racy videos of her in various states of undress to World Star Hip Hop, where she instantly garnered 100K subscribers – and the rest as they say is history. In the decade since then, Renner has built up a following nearly five million strong on Instagram, has had a bestselling memoir to her credit and is gearing up to launch a podcast show of her own, among other things.

And to be sure, Renner is by no means alone: An entire multi-million dollar (if not billion dollar!) business has emerged on Instagram, featuring conspicuously beautiful women who use their hitting the genetic beauty lottery to propel themselves into internet stardom – and why not? Women of beauty have and will continue to profit from the enterprise in various guises and permutations. It is something as old as humanity itself, in fact.

Renner states in her interview with Samuels, that she is often derided for being a Black woman of “mediocre talent” who “sucked and fucked her way to the top” and who is best known to the world for “showing her ass” – and my response to that is, “What’s wrong with that?”. Only men who suffer from a massive case of Sour Grapes would begrudge beautiful women from being able to profit from their stunning good looks.

And that’s the point of our discussion today.

While there has been an outpouring of “concern” and “morality” of dubious origin on the part of far too many Black men online, the truth of the matter is that Black women like Renner – free spirited and outspoken – have always been around. We would call them “Good Time Charlenes”, the feminized version of the “Good Time Charlie” that the lovely ladies know so well. “Fun time girls”, “party girls”, whatever term you want to use, these ladies have always existed, have always been among us – and, truth be told, have always been the source of pleasure and enjoyment for men. Especially those men who might not have been able to garner it otherwise in a more hidebound age.

And that’s what the Brittany Renners, the late Miss Mercedes Morrs and others, put a white-hot searing spotlight on: The fact that such ladies are able to garner widespread followings, brand deals, career opportunities and yes, “sponsorship” from highly-successful Black men, all through their ability to maximize and sell their sexuality to Black men writ large – and LOTS of Black men have a serious problem with that.

The question, is why?

SHAMELESS PLUG AD BREAK: Haven’t you heard? The wait is over, and it’s official – “The Book of Obsidian: A Manual for the 21st Century Black American Gentleman” has finally arrived and is NOW available at BookBaby, Amazon and wherever fine books are sold – get your copy NOW!!! Better yet, get your personally autographed copy – CLICK HERE for more details! OK, let’s get back to the article!

“THE MADONNA-WHORE COMPLEX” IN EXTREMIS
Since the time of pioneering psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud, much has been made of modern men’s tendency to “compartmentalize” the modern woman’s various guises and roles in public and private life. Even more to the point, that men have “divided” a woman up into a “whore” – that is to say, the more sexual and wanton side of herself; and the “madonna” – that is to say, the more virginal, “pure” and matronly side of herself.

I would like to suggest that not only was Freud onto something there, but that when put into a Black American context, which is one that has been widely accepted by both academics and ordinary lay people as de facto matriarchal, the “madonna/whore complex” takes on a whole new level of meaning. Black women, particularly in their role as “Big Mama”, hold tremendous sway over entire communities of Black Americans historically and especially in the present day, where the vast majority of Black Americans, men and women alike, are born out of wedlock and reared by single mothers. For millions of Black men – starting with the latch key “Generation X” – this has taken on enormous importance and has powerful implications for our discussion here.

Many Black men have idolized their mothers and other maternal figures in their lives like grand mothers, aunts, elder female cousins and even older (or younger!) sisters to the point that they can do no wrong, are saintly and in effect, are asexual. Moreover, many Black men who have daughters even ramp this pedestalization up a few notches, seeing their daughters are “perfect” beings for whom no man is good enough, and of course, again asexualizing them in the process. Yet, many of these very same Black men are known to “make it rain” on strippers at the club, are rampant users of online porn and other adult entertainment media like XVideos, PornHub and OnlyFans, and/or are notorious womanizers, players or cheaters, often harming their spouses or significant others in the process. Add to all this, the aforementioned fact that Black women are truly free to be themselves, to explore the many facets of themselves public and private, and even more to the point, exploit their sexuality online for profit, and it truly creates one heck of a heady mix to contend with here for many, many Black American men in our time.

And, of course, because these dynamics play themselves out in a 21st century Black American context, all the “extra hot sauce” comes into play, taking all of this to extreme levels. It’s quite a thing to witness, especially in our social media-saturated age.

My point here is to say this: There are far too many Black men who have serious issues seeing Black women as full human beings, rather than compartmentalized bits and pieces. And if YOU happen to be such a Black man, the “problem” isn’t the fact that Black women like Brittany Renner or the late Miss Mercedes Morr can now make millions from their looks, body and sexuality online; the problem, is YOU. You can’t handle modernity; you have problems adjusting to a 21st century world; and you can’t accept that Black women – particularly the ones like the aforementioned Renner and Morr – are free to do what they like, with whom they like.

Which may not include you.

SHAMELESS PLUG AD BREAK: Haven’t you heard? The wait is over, and it’s official – “The Book of Obsidian: A Manual for the 21st Century Black American Gentleman” has finally arrived and is NOW available at BookBaby, Amazon and wherever fine books are sold – get your copy NOW!!! Better yet, get your personally autographed copy – CLICK HERE for more details! OK, let’s get back to the article!

HOW TO HANDLE “GOOD TIME CHARLENES” LIKE BRITTANY RENNER
One of the major critiques of Renner by untold Black men online, is that she (and presumably, other “Instagram Model Grade” Black women) is a “balls out” sociopath; they recount how Renner has openly talked about how to “thirst trap” pro ballers; how she cruised school campuses talking about “watch your sons”; and was merely out on the make for a quick comeup. This was the basis of many Black men’s online defense of NBA player P.J. Washington, Renner’s baby daddy – that he was a doe-eyed university student when he met Renner, several years his senior and clearly in the “power position” over him due to her online fame and noteriety while he was still a lowly NBA prospect. The argument, so it goes, was that Renner deliberately sought out Washington, because he was young, inexperienced, wet behind the ears and thus, easy pickings to “trap” him with a baby, and get a nice stipend in the form of inflated child support payments for the next 18 years due to Washington’s high earnings as a basketball player (which, according to the website HoopsHype.com, is $4.2M USD for the current season, and a projected $5.8M USD for the 2022/2023 season).

Of course, the devil is in the details, which I won’t bother to belabor here; instead, I’ll merely direct you to my recent live on-air commentary on the whole ball of wax – tighten your chinstrap! (“Thoughts on the Brittany Renner/Kevin Samuels Interview”, The Obsidian Media Network 2 YouTube channel, Nov 12, 2021)

Now, let’s get down to the good stuff: Good Time Charlenes like Brittany Renner, are what I referred to in “The Book of Obsidian” as a Dark Triad Woman: A woman who exhibits high levels of Narcissism, Machiavellianism and Psychopathy. These kinds of women, which again I reiterate Renner is the poster child for, are very easy to spot. For starters, like Renner, they are “over the top” attractive – far and away more so than today’s average Black woman. Second, they make it a point to be on social media, almost always in a very “revealing” sort of way. Even if they don’t make a full or even part time living out of it, they nevertheless get an “ego-boost” from the enterprise. And third, they very much are looking to profit from their womanly charms, usually along a short term mating axis – this is where “Dinner Whoring” comes from.

As Non-Select men in this dojo, we both know, understand, and EMBRACE all of this. We do, not because we think that being a Dark Triad personality is something to be lauded; but rather, that we know how to deal with such ladies should we decide to do so, and understand that short term mating – and that IS what we’re talking about here, is part of the human experience, no matter how much our “blue pilled” society may try to deny it. For the unintiated, checkout my column “The Five Best Good Time Girls In Black America” (Negromanosphere.com, Nov 17, 2020) & listen up:

1. Know Who & What You’re Dealing With: Or, in other words, “You can’t make a Hoe into a Housewife”. It strikes me as particularly odd that such a “barbershop truism” has to be repeated in print in the 21st century, but PJ Washington, among a great many other men, have made my reiterating such a point necessary. A major problem many Black men have in our time today, and which flows right into the theme of today’s discussion, is that they want to “domesticate” free-spirited bohemian types like the Brittany Renners of the world, instead of merely accepting them for who and what they are, and enjoying them for the length of time they’re together with such ladies – be that for a night, or a season. Even more to the point – and as quiet as its kept – quite a few Black men attempt to “trap” or otherwise “lockdown” such a frisky filly as Renner, by putting a baby in them. Indeed, one of the most powerful pickup lines ever, is “I want to have a baby with you”, as topflight sociologists Kathryn Edin & Maria Kefalas detail in their 2005 critically acclaimed work, “Promises I Can Keep: Why Poor Women Put Motherhood Before Marriage”.

2. Manage Expectations – Hers & Yours: Here you have to be, in the words of Alan Roger Currie, “upfront & straightforward”. You’re not looking to marry the lovely lady; you’re not even looking to have her as a serious companion. You’re just looking for a good time, not a long time. LET HER KNOW THAT. Tell her that you two will have a great time, and make it clear that you have no problem compensating her for her time – oh yes, women are a cost, and really hot ones even more so. Many Black men have mucho issues and problems with that, and part of the reason why is due to the aforementioned need to control and domesticate a filly like Renner. But I think we all know, how that strategy has played out, right? It doesn’t work. It will never work. As for managing your own expectations, see #1 above, and keep it in mind as you spend a great time but not a long time with the frisky filly of your choice. Instead, make it known upfront what you want from her, what you’re willing to do in exchange, and enjoy!

3. Take Personal Responsibility & Control For Your Life: One of the biggest – and most shocking – takeaways from the still-ongoing saga of Brittany Renner for me, is just how many Black men online who seem hellbent on going to the mat for PJ Washington, insisting on casting him as a hapless victim who couldn’t help but to put his dick into Renner and shoot up the club, so to speak. As former British Prime Minister Tony Blair once famously said, “Weak, weak, weak!” – it is fundamentally WEAK for any man, to blame others for actions he freely undertook himself. If you want to spend an evening or a season with women like the lovely Ms. Renner, OWN UP TO IT & MAKE MOVES ACCORDINGLY. Unless you’re OK with being seen out and about with such ladies, make it discreet, make it worth her time and make it clear that you’re together for pure pleasure and enjoyment – and enjoy the fond memories when everything has been concluded. No matter what, we Obsidians take no shorts when it comes to personal responsibility – we are responsible and claim complete responsibility for, things we CHOSE to do. If you choose to deal with a Brittany Renner, own it. And know what you’re dealing with. And have fun!

CONCLUSION
Contrary to the outrage of Black men online, women like Brittany Renner are by no means anything new; they’ve been around down through history. There’s a reason why the very names of Anais Nin, the Mata Hari & Marilyn Monroe, just to name a precious few, are synonymous with “free spirited”. Indeed, if anything, and here I cite the work of social media expert online media outlets and sources, like SocialMediaToday.com (“How to Spot a Narcissist on Social Media”, Nov 16, 2016), PsychologyToday.com (“Narcissism and Social Media: Should We Be Afraid?”, Sep 13, 2019) and ScienceDaily.com (“Excessive posting of selfies is associated with increase in narcissism”, Nov 8, 2018), we can fully expect the rise of Dark Triad traits to rise in women in the years to come, particularly those who were born to be very attractive – like Ms. Renner. Therefore, it behooves us Non-Select men to know how to identify, assess and decide, as to whether we wish to entertain such a lovely – albeit potentially dangerous – lady into our lives.

One thing is for sure, though: The future is now, and we aren’t going back. Black women have proven themselves a far sight more adept at adapting to freedom in our brave new world.

It’s time that we Black men – especially the Non-Select among us – followed suit.

Now adjourn your asses…

MOA

Mumia Obsidian Ali is a citizen journalist, podcaster, talk radio show host, commentator, newly minted dating coach and author of “The Book of Obsidian: A Manual for the 21st Century Black American Gentleman”. You can catch his daily live shows on YouTube & Mixlr, as well as his dating coach column at the Negromanosphere website. One of the “Three Kings” of the Black Manosphere, Mr. Ali has contributed to the creation and development of Black Male Media. Follow him on Instagram at @ObsidianRadio. He’s also a semi-professional pest.