Historically, men have been known to be very jealous, possessive, and territorial when it comes to their dealings with women.  Many men have been known to initiate fights with other men just for looking at their long-term girlfriend, fiancée, or wife in a flirtatious manner.  In extreme cases, men have sometimes murdered both their spouse and another man who the woman was rumored to be having an extramarital affair with.

One of the major factors that led to women fighting for Second-wave Feminism was to prevent their fathers, their stepfathers, and even their own husbands from having too much say-so over what they do with their own bodies, and more specifically, what they do with their own vaginas.

In today’s society, many view men who seek to ‘own’ a woman’s body and her vagina as being “unrealistic” at minimum, and at maximum there are others who tend to perceive these types of men as being ‘delusional’ and personifying the notion of ‘toxic masculinity.’  Are these categorizations and perceptions valid or invalid?

For the remainder of this article, I will highlight a few categories of men who seem to have no problem whatsoever with their female sexual lovers sharing their bodies and vaginas with other men … even sometimes right in front of their face.


The most obvious first category of men who rarely if ever seek to ‘own’ a woman’s body and rarely if ever seek to prevent their female lovers from engaging in sexual relations with one or more other men are men who enthusiastically and willingly indulge in one or more episodes of short-term non-monogamous ‘casual’ sex with multiple women.

Men in this category only care about their own sexual gratification, and never seek to establish any sort of ‘emotional connection’ with a woman.  Therefore, the issue of jealousy or possessiveness never enters into the picture.

Men in this category are many times consciously aware of the potential to cross paths with a woman who is sexually ‘unhealthy’ (i.e., the woman has tested positive for an STD) and/or a woman who might be mentally unbalanced and emotionally unstable.


As mentioned above, when a man engages in non-monogamous sexual relations with a woman one time, two times, three times or for some other very brief period of time, that is generally referred to as promiscuous sexual behavior.

On the other hand, when a man engages in non-monogamous sexual relations with a woman for an indefinite period of time … and in addition, he has developed some degree of an ‘emotional connection’ with his sexual lovers … this is generally referred to as polyamorous sexual behavior.

Polyamory can include …

  • Swinging (for those men who do not currently have a long-term partner or spouse)
  • Couple-Swapping (when two more married or unmarried couples all engage in sex with each other on a regular, semi-regular, or occasional basis)
  • ‘Open’ Marriages (when a man or woman allows their spouse to take on additional lovers, such as a concubine)
  • Polyamorous ‘Family’ (when two or more couples – married or unmarried – share the same residential living space and they all raise their children together)

Cautionary warning for men:  Anytime you allow your strong emotions to enter into sexual relationship, in due time feelings of jealousy, envy, and/or possessiveness may begin to slowly but surely develop.  It takes a man with a very healthy and secure ego to allow his wife, fiancée, or long-term girlfriend to openly engage in sex with other men.


Men who operate as pimps do not truly view their casual sex lovers as companions or partners as much as they view them as “obedient employees” who they allow to have sex with male clients (otherwise known as ‘tricks’) for a profit.  For pimps, sharing their sexual lovers (i.e., prostitutes and other whores-for-hire) with men is all about business.


Men who function as a woman’s ‘Sugar Daddy’ do not really involve themselves in a true relationship or marriage with a woman, but rather, they indulge in what is known as a financially negotiated “arrangement” with a woman who is referred to as their ‘Sugar Baby,’ and they essentially ‘wine and dine’ the woman (e.g., pay most if not all of her living expenses, some of her college tuition, treat her to free movies and social events, purchase various materialistic gifts for her, etc.) in exchange for regular or semi-regular access to the woman’s sexual companionship.

A man who functions somewhat similar to a Sugar Daddy, but at the same time, is very different than your average Sugar Daddy type is what is known as a ‘BDSM Cuckold.’  The vast majority of men who allow themselves to be a woman’s Cuckold are usually just as financially generous as the typical Sugar Daddy type is, but their personality and overall behavior is much more passive, subservient, and masochistic.  Cuckolds are usually limited to engaging in oral sex with their wife, fiancée, or long-term companion only.  Cuckolds take masochistic pleasure out of playing the role of voyeur while watching their significant other get banged by a man who is more erotically dominant and more masculine than themselves, and usually possesses a more well-endowed penis.

Another difference between a Sugar Daddy type and a BDSM Cuckold is that some Sugar Daddies are promiscuous and/or polyamorous with women other than their designated Sugar Babies, while Cuckolds are always loyal and faithfully monogamous to their spouse or long-term companion.


Not all married women cheat on their husbands, but in today’s society, there is definitely a significant percentage of married women who cheat behind their husband’s back (similarly, a good percentage of married men cheat on their wives behind their back as well) even though these same women exchanged marriage vows promising to remain faithfully monogamous to their spouse.

It is always best to seek out sex partners who are brutally honest about their desire to maintain two or more lovers at any point in time rather than to connect with a woman sexually who gives you the misleading impression that she is all about strict monogamy, but in the long-run, her actions prove her words to be highly invalid and lacking credibility.

Note: Columnist Alan Roger Currie will not have a published article posted on the following dates due to his travel schedule and/or vacation plans:

  • Monday, October 15, 2018
  • Monday, October 22, 2018
  • Monday, November 26, 2018
  • Monday, December 24, 2018
  • Monday, December 31, 2018

Senior writer Alan Roger Currie was recently named the 2017 Charles Tyler Freelance Writer & Columnist of the Year for the NegroManosphere.com, and he was also named the NegroManosphere.com’s 2017 Best Dating Coach for Men on YouTube and 2017 Black Male YouTube Personality of the Year. More about Alan Roger Currie can be found on Wikipedia.org; Visit Currie’s main website to find out more about his Email consultations, Skype & Telephone consultations, and One-on-One / Face-to-Face Coaching sessions. Currie also has an active YouTube channel where he offers his own unique brand of knowledge, wisdom, insight, and general advice related to dating and relationships. If you are a single heterosexual man, and you want advice on how to develop the confidence and courage to be more upfront, specific and straightforwardly honest about your sexual desires, interests, and intentions with women, check out Currie’s eBooks, paperbacks, and audiobooks. Currie has been a featured speaker at many dating advice workshops for men in the United States as well as internationally. Currie was the first African-American to be a featured speaker at The 21 Convention and will be a featured speaker again this year in October in Orlando, Florida. If you want to become a Patreon.com subscriber of Dating Coach Alan Roger Currie, CLICK HERE