I have to say I really struggled to write this down. I was just lying on my couch, bored on a Saturday morning wondering what to spruce up.
Then bam! I saw that article by Donovan about why he doesn’t blame Black women for being angry. And it was just unfortunate how he highlighted doleful facts about the demise that has befallen black women.
Well I’m here to offer redemption and assure black/African women that it’s not too late to make an about turn. An about turn to become better achievers, better girlfriends, better mothers and in general better people who command the much warranted respect and adoration from all of us.
And how do they go about doing that?
First of all, they need to stop being suspicious of men and actually live. What do I mean? Most African/black women are always hoodwinked to think men are always out to get them. That they are treating them nicely and according them love in order to get what they want, sex that is then leave them out to hang dry. I know, most guys have been known to do that but we’re definitely all different. So no need to live on the defensive suspicious that there is always something up my sleeve. That when I take out for dinner and give some good dickin soon after, then I must be up to something. I must definitely be seeing someone else and the good gestures are simply to cover up my tracks. Nooo, you can’t live life like that!
Secondly, most African women don’t work towards improving themselves in any way if you ask me. Even here in Kenya where I come from, it’s not in most women’s place to work hard in school, improve their people skills, try out entrepreneurship and simply push themselves to the limit. The narrative here and I suspect in the States is that a man is the one supposed to do that. Why should they put in all the work and they have a vagina, and ass, and titties; isn’t that what the ultimate prize for the hardworking man is?
Well it’s not…..men are also looking for something extra. A bit more of intelligence, emotional stability and physical attractiveness something most black women don’t work towards. They just sit pretty expecting things to work themselves out only for them to be shocked when successful black men opt to date and settle down with white women. And trust me that’s where the bitterness emanates from.
Thirdly, there is much need to have a support system within black women. I suspect the reason most black women don’t make considerable strides towards physical, emotional and financial well-being is because their fellow women are always trying to bring them down. When one woman attempts to make a change and empower themselves, then other women come in droves pointing fingers and accusing them of being traitors. And thus for fear of rebuke and rejection, most African women just maintain the status quo and settle for less. This has been costly as African/black women are now synonymous with being at the bottom of the chain sexually, financially and in every other aspect that you could think of. That needs to change immediately if a revolution has to be witnessed. Women need to have zero tolerance for this kind of uncouth behavior and refuse to be part of such an unhealthy environment.
As put in an article published by the Huff Post, Why tear another Black woman down in order to build yourself up? Be kind to other women! You do not have to agree with everything another woman does, but show respect, and agree to disagree. You do not have to result to trash talking, name calling, and getting up in someone’s face. Just stop! It’s really not that serious. We do not need the stigma. What is so phenomenal about being mean, nasty, and just vile?
Lastly, black/African just need to stop being so miserable…jeeez…who hurt you? They are nothing but pessimistic whinny bitches that never see anything good. How do you expect us to prosper when all you’re doing is emasculating and bringing us down? The way the male psyche works; there is always dire need for excessive dosages of ego boosters in order to perform as full optimum. Want a black man or just any man to perform, then encourage him and pamper his ego…trust he will bring down the moon just for you to touch. White girls know this and so do Asian girls and that’s why you are seeing more African men going after them as they exude positivity and good vibes.
Work towards that and you’ll be on a long journey to prosperity!
Bf can’t depent on a man :(